So about that voting; I can’t do that. I’m not registered and the election has already been called so I can just sit in a darkened room with my fingers in my ears right?
I guess you could do that but surely sticking your fingers in your ears will make it really difficult to WhatsApp people? I mean I don’t know how you are at typing with your elbows?
Yeah you make a good point, I’ll use earplugs.
Well actually good news. You still have time to register to vote. Registration closes at 11:59pm on 18 June for the general election this year. There are also a couple of other benefits that you get from being on the electoral role (that’s the fancy name for the list of people who have registered to vote).
Oh yeah like what? Are we talking free Disney+ or clubcard points?
Umm, no. But you will see an increase to your credit rating as it will confirm your address with your bank. I mean you’ll still be £100k short of that deposit for partial ownership on a garden shed to live in but it might help you get a better rate on a loan or a credit card.
But I don’t have the time right now, they’ll need lots of information and that’s effort.
It won’t take long just go to www.gov.uk/registertovote. You’ll need some basic details like your name; I hope you haven’t forgotten that, your address and your national insurance number. Tell you what you do it now and I’ll wait. Cue the hold music-
...dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-deee...
Back again! You’re right that wasn’t too bad. Now am I all set to vote?
Possibly, You’ve registered which is the first step. There’s just one more thing you are going to need which is some photo ID. Do you have a driver’s licence?
Does it have to be a full licence or is a provisional okay?
Either is fine actually.
Well I don’t have either, but I do have a gym membership card I think for that gym I went to that one time. Will that do?
Nope, not going to cut it. There is a full list of acceptable ID on the Electoral Commission website. Also it’s worth mentioning that it’s best to use ID that’s in date even though that isn’t technically a requirement. I tried using my old passport at the local elections last May and apparently I don’t look like a 6 month old baby any more. It’s so unfair right! Well you go look at that link and I’ll cue some more hold music.
...dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-deee...
And I’m back again. Not good news though; pretty sure I don’t have any of those documents. Thanks for wasting my time on that registration.
You’ve not totally wasted your time, after all you’ve still improved your credit rating by registering. Also all is not lost there are 2 options available to you.
Go on…
So option 1 is you apply for what’s called a voter authority certificate which is a fancy name for a photo ID that specifically lets you vote. You can apply for one of those from your local council; Google (or bing if you live in mid 2008) Voter Authority Certificate and follow the process online. It shouldn’t take more than 5 minutes you will need to upload a passport style photo but you can take that with your phone.
You forgot I live in a darkened room with my fingers in my ears right?
Okay, firstly HOW ARE YOU TYPING THIS?!? and secondly no worries there is always option 2. Option 2 is you can apply for a postal vote. To do this you’ll need to go here - www.gov.uk/apply-postal-vote. You’ll need a lot of the same information you needed to register to vote along with a photograph of your signature. If you can’t do a photo of your signature because you are for example living in a blackened room with your fingers in your ears then you can request a paper form which you can fill in. Shall I hold some more for you to get it done then?
Sure, just let me find the lighARGGGGGHH!
...dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-dee-dum-dum-dee-do-dee-dum dum-dee-dum-dum-dum-deee...
I think we’ll check back in with them later. I do hope they’re okay...